Growing up, I was always lucky enough to live ten minutes away from Downtown Huntington Beach. With a father who was adamant about taking advantage of living in Southern California -- walking and biking everywhere -- it was not uncommon to see us strolling hand-in-hand on our way to Main Street. Nevertheless, I soon adopted the peculiar habit of smelling every single flower along the way, turning the ten minute walk into a two hour ordeal.
So was my perspective of the world as I spent my days quite literally stopping to smell the roses. I lived in the aftermath of 9/11 and through one of the worst recessions in American history without even the faintest hint of awareness; I don't think I even knew about the subprime mortgage crisis until my sophomore year of high school. Rather, I was focused on the natural world surrounding me, trying not to let one ounce of beauty escape my developing image of reality.
Now, the class of 2020 -- myself included -- is once again living in a time in which social institutions are dwelling in their own demise. Restaurants are closing, the economy is slumping, and many individuals are unable to even leave their homes. However, unlike 9/11 and the Great Recession, the COVID-19 pandemic has slipped into the awareness of my generation, and we are slowly learning that we can no longer depend on the socially constructed reality we have become acquainted with.
We can no longer rely on capitalism, which has favored the rich at the expense of the poor and deprived the sick of necessary medical care. We can no longer rely on education, which has been reduced to online classes that minimize the capacity to learn. We can no longer rely on extracurriculars, most of which have been cancelled in an effort to promote social distancing. We can no longer rely on graduation, which would have been the reward for our twelve years of hard work.
So yeah, it f***ing sucks that, after surviving AP Chemistry and fumbling my way through Calculus, I may have to have my diploma mailed to me. My classmates and I are pissed, and rightfully so. When you combine teen angst with a global pandemic, you get an odd sort of frustration. The fear, the anger, the sadness, the desire for community forms a conglomerate you cannot quite comprehend.
The class of 2020 was brought into the world in a time of chaos and confusion, havoc and hellfire, and we are just now coming to terms with that fact. And, from what I've gathered, most of us are struggling with this sudden realization, as we are told to keep our vibrations high and our negativity low. We are told to worry, but not too much. We sit and watch the television screen, projecting greater numbers on the daily, and there is nothing we can do about it.
As for me, I'm struggling to find a way to "stop and smell the roses" while still being able to address what is occurring in the global community; I'm searching for that fine line between ignorance and awareness, innocence and maturity. While I have not yet found this happy medium, I have come to the conclusion that the most productive thing I can do during this time is lessen my reliance on social institutions. I will no longer accept Wall Street as reality and the media as truth. Truthfully, we are the creators of our own realities, and even when the hurting and pain of the world is out of our control, we have the ability to look inwards at our own humanity.
So do whatever you need to do during these times. Do some yoga, use some essential oils, read a book, do some soul searching. Appreciate the things you have while they last, and let go of the things over which you have no control (with that being said, practices such as social distancing are in your control). If this pandemic has taught us one thing, it is that we cannot rely on anything -- not even the constructs that civilization has taught us to love.
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